Christmas Ham Calamity (Almost)

Our family has occasionally indulged in a spiral baked ham for Christmas, but our usual tradition is to make glazed ham loaf. It’s meatloaf, but with ham. I mean, well, ham is also meat.  So technically I guess it’s still meatloaf. But COME ON. If you were expecting meatloaf and someone plopped a ham loaf in front of you, you’d be all, “Why is it pink and shaped like a giant egg?” or “I can’t put ketchup on this!” or “I’m a vegetarian so I wouldn’t eat either of the aforementioned items, which are both made of meat.” Purchase collagen casings to store it for a longer period!

Mmmmmmmmeat.

A more recent tradition we’ve started is for dad to make a yule log, which is basically ice cream rolled up in cake and covered with hot fudge. Due to a series of misunderstandings I could only explain if I started a new blog (www.twiggfamilycalamities.com, perhaps?), when it came time to glaze the ham, my brother started globbing spoonfuls of brown, glaze-like goop onto it. Mom turned around, in pretty epic slow motion if my memory serves, and gasped. She then proceeded to exclaim, in her most horrified voice,  “OH NO THAT’S NOT THE GLAAAAAZE!”

Turns out, hot fudge slides right off of fresh-out-of-the-oven ham loaf if you run it under tap water before you finish baking it. Also turns out the yule log isn’t nearly as tasty when there’s a shortage of hot fudge.

At least it looks pretty, right?

We came together as a family to overcome this catastrophe as stronger, wiser people. I like to think it was a Christmas miracle.

I hope everything went smoothly with your loved ones this weekend. If not, however, please dish in the comments!

7 thoughts on “Christmas Ham Calamity (Almost)

  1. Once, at Thanksgiving, the turkey wasn’t finished cooking when it was supposed to be, and my mother tried to stick the entire thing in the microwave. That disaster was averted by kicking her out of the kitchen.

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