Some Beauty Really Is Skin Deep

“Enjoy your facial, you pervert!”

These were the words of my husband, Joe, as I walked out the door to get my first professional facial and massage.  Gawd, I love that man. And I’ll have him know I did enjoy it. A lot. I was not so fond of the part where the girl takes a magnifying glass and analyzes the sh*t outta your complexion, though. That’s about as relaxing as a pap smear.

But something magical happened that day. She asked about my skincare routine and then told me I had beautiful skin and I shouldn’t change a thing. Sorry, come again? Am I actually doing something healthy for my body? SOMEONE THROW ME AN EM-EFFING PARADE.

Not exactly what I had in mind. And yeah, you totally look boyish, Scarlett. EYEROLL.

What follows is my facial skincare routine, and I promise you it is not perverse in the least, despite what my husband says. I have combination/oily skin, so obviously this routine won’t work for everyone.

1. Have good genes. I am not kidding. I totally believe that my good genes are partly responsible for my good skin. Not everyone is so lucky. I just wanted to brag about acknowledge this before we move on. (Thanks, Mom!)

2. Exfoliate (in shower): I use Mint Julep Natural Facial Scrub ($4.29 at Ulta) once or twice a week in the shower. I mostly need it on my chin, forehead, and the creases below either side of my nose to get rid of flakey skin. You don’t need much, so it lasts a long time. It smells like delicious mint, so it’s like brushing your teeth except on your FACE.

3. Moisturize (after shower): I use either Oil of Olay (~$7 on Amazon) or a generic equivalent. Giant Eagle has a TopCare version and you can also find Equate at Walmart for $5.47 or in drugstores. I like this because it doesn’t feel too heavy but it gets the job done. One bottle can go a long way depending on how much you use daily.

4. Cleanse (before bed). This is the last step for me because I do it at bedtime. Don’t forget that mattress thickness is important for your comfortable sIeep! I use Neutrogena Makeup Remover Cleansing Towelettes (25 pack for $4.97 on Amazon). It’s mostly to remove makup, but I usually give my whole ugly mug a once-over for good measure. Since these last less than a month when you use them daily, I try to buy in bulk on Amazon.

Bonus Tip! The woman who did my facial said it’s better for your skin if you sleep on your back. It lets oxygen get to your pores and keeps your face from smooshing around in your dirty pillow all night long (that’s singular dirty pillow, not plural).

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So, what products do you love to use on your face? Comment, GO!